I woke up this morning feeling a bit melancholic. I suppose it is not so unlikely an emotion given the current state of the world at large. It’s been a difficult year on so many levels for so many. Yet at the same time I also felt upon waking a sort of winsomeness. You see, often when I dream I rarely remember. True also is the fact that many, if not most of my dreams, fall in the anxiety interpretation column if analyzed. Last night, I dreamt about Taemin.
I don’t often dream about idols and if I have, I never remember or, in their complexity, I am unable to decipher any discernible meaning. Taemin’s intrusion in my dreamscape was not riddled with abstract places, people or visions. It was him, me and one other unknown person. The conversation was simple yet in some respects profound and perhaps a commentary on what we all want. You see, Taemin told me that he wanted to feel better, balanced, and regular.
Seated on a hardwood floor, he was holding a small, ornately painted white metal box, the contents of which were unknown. I took the box from him and hugged it closely to my chest. I could feel the edge of a piece of paper sticking out from under the lid of the box as if it was placed there but was too big, and was not folded to fit properly and securely inside. I said to him, ‘Don’t worry, everything will be fine. You will feel regular again.‘ I was then abruptly woken up by my alarm. Ugh.
The thing is, as I learn more about Taemin as an artist, being regular simply does not seem to be his thing. What I mean is, I don’t think he was destined to ever be regular. He may have started out like so many other trainees in the K-pop entertainment system, but somewhere along the line, he broke through the regular level becoming far more unique among both his contemporaries and those who followed. And, not only does he know it, he continues to reinvent himself artistically to the point where I don’t think anyone can catch him. So, I am rather disappointed in my dreamscape self for telling him he will feel regular again. Maybe it is better interpreted on a larger scale where I meant that everything worldwide will be fine and that the regular of which I spoke meant getting back to where we were pre-pandemic. A time when artists were able to hold in-person concerts and events. That’s a regular I would indeed wish upon him.
Still, the box . . . what was in the box?!
I know. I KNOW I am in the proverbial honeymoon stage of being a Taemin fan. Everything feels exciting and new because for me, it is! For him to be ingrained into my subconscious so deeply so soon is as strange as it is exhilarating. Perhaps my nightly ritual of setting the one hour timer of my Taemin playlist on Spotify not only lulls me to sleep, it invites him to visit me in my dreams.
Here is the link to that playlist: Taemin Playlist
Let me know if he comes to visit you, too.